DO YOU KNOW WHAT TO ASK ELDERLY PARENTS OR GRANDPARENTS?
This is an uncomfortable situation to have to be in.
I have had to do this myself, & I can tell you it’s not easy like the commercials show on television.
Why? Denial, no one wants to talk about death.
But I can tell you that if you don’t talk about this subject to get some clarity, the issues that you will go through are very difficult & can cost YOU a lot of money.
So, today I’m going to talk to you as a friend & as a nurse, which I am. I’ve spent my career dealing with life & death situations & all that go with it, and I’m going to be blunt about some things. I assure you that those who did not make these questions a priority, have gone through a massive roll of red tape.
Even if your family situation is such that you feel this doesn’t pertain to you because you aren’t close, OR your family is already deceased, you may either relatives still living. In addition, you may have family or friends who do pertain to this information.
So, to avoid sitting in an attorney’s office without any of this information after the fact, please, take note of this short list of city, state & government requirements.
Do you know what to ask elderly parents or grandparents?
Do you have an attorney.
Do you have an up to date will.
Do you have any hidden assets or liabilities.
Where do you keep your important financial documents.
Who will handle your affairs, if you become incapacitated.
Do you have a living will.
Do you have a medical power of attorney.
Do you have sufficient medical insurance.
Do you have long term care insurance.
Have you made funeral plans.
Will your estate owe taxes, & do you have money to pay them.
Do you have an Administratrix / Administrator of the Estate.
I realize these are not things that most of us want to discuss much less get involved in. However, I cannot stress to you enough, the urgent matter of these documents & conversation be confronted, dealt with now & NOT put off for any reason.
Without these BASIC DOCUMENTS listed above drawn up by an attorney, on file & each kept in a place where you can find them quickly & easily, you will have a difficult mess on your hands. I honestly cannot stress enough the importance of these documents.
“You cannot change, what you refuse to confront”……..
I hope enjoyed today’s blog & were able to take something away from this subject.. Please leave me your comments below, I would love to hear them. Most importantly, thank you for visiting my post.
See you tomorrow…………
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I’m following you! You have some great advice in your blogs. I especially like this one and the one you did a few days ago on dealing with adult children moving back home (http://www.dailyadversitysupport.com/do-you-know-how-to-handle-your-adult-children-moving-back-in/). Awesome advice!
Oh gosh, I was the ogre in my family for awhile bc I dared to ask these questions, they eventually got over it and got all this in place, thankfully, but it was a drag for 6-10 months, I was a bit ostracized for bringing up ‘death’ – *sigh* great points and a case worker gave me this info so I’m thankful nurses give this info out! – Zen
Zen, Ive had so many of the “gasps” occur when I bring this up. There hasn’t been an anything but “gasps” reactions during my nursing career when I brought this up that somebody was horrified that I would dare bring up such a thing. Unfortunately, it’s a must subject. Thanks for sharing.
This was great information. You are so right, these can be difficult questions to ask but it really is better to be prepared up front. Thank you for the list, it will come in handy.
Thank you Chantae for your insight. It is a very touchy subject, but it’s best to get it down & prepared before you can’t. Thanks for taking the time to visit my blog.
Great Post Linda and certainly one that everyone needs to read. Death is such a taboo subject for so many people. It’s so important to have things sorted. Thanks.
You are so right Rhonda, there is never a good or perfect time to discuss this fragile subject. People have no idea the mess they’ll be facing if they don’t get this taken care of & ready to go. Thank you for your thoughts.
Thankfully Linda my parents had everything in place so I never had to have the conversation with them. My mum is still alive in a nursing home but everything was taken care of. It is so important and good you have put it out there.
Great advice~~it is so much easier if people communicate and take care of these matters when they can. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks Annette, it is truly a nightmare legally, if this is not taken care of properly before it’s all needed. Never put this off. Thank you for sharing.
What an important post. I worked for an Estate Lawyer and we saw this all the time. People who either prepared ahead of time or those who didn’t. Those who didn’t — really suffered! Thanks for bringing this information to the forefront of peoples minds. And I love this quote…“You cannot change, what you refuse to confront”
Kristin I’m so glad you understand how important this issue is. I’ve seen families of the deceased, wiped out financially because they denied the need to prepare beforehand. Thank you for your thoughts.